I dont know?

Well here I am again, and not sure what to write about. I guess I will just get something out of my head, to the world? So my mom went into the hospital last week and we weren’t sure how it would go. With a little history into our relationship, my mom got really sick about 10 years ago and it devastated the entire family in every way. She was the back bone for everything! She raised three of us on her own and worked full time as an RN. I really looked up to my mom seeing everything she accomplished including three brats, for awhile I remember a time I wanted to be an RN, until I realized bodily fluids freak me out. So when she got sick I kind of lost it, for awhile she was the strong person I had always known. Then things changed, she started to give up. Over the years I watched her loose more and more of her fight and slowly deteriorate. Finally I realized she was done trying to find a way to get better. I just couldn’t take it anymore, I wanted to rember her the way she was, the one I looked up to. Slowly my visits became shorter and less frequent. When she was in the hospital last week it just brought up all the pain of when she first got sick. With work, school, and a wife I made time to be with her every day she was there. After a few days of being there, she pops out of bed the person I remember from before she got sick ten years ago (well not quite but really close). She seems to have the passion back for a better and happier quality of life. With that said, here is where this troubles me. What happens if she goes back to the way she was? How much should I push and/or stand by her side and fight or at all? I don’t really think I have it in me to do that, especially if we fail again. The questions are rhetorical.